Sunday, October 9, 2011

This will be a long one...

I started writing this post nearly an hour ago. In the middle of it, we had a power surge and I lost the entire thing. *headdesk* I'm going to attempt to re-write it, but I must admit I feel discouraged at having to!

I have always been a very open-minded person. If someone falls in love with someone of the same sex, they should have the same rights to get married and live their lives with that person as the rest of us. Just as if someone decides that they want to change their sex from male to female, or vice versa, who am I to say they can't (or shouldn't)?

I came out to my parents at the tender young age of 16, when I was still somewhat questioning my own sexuality. It wasn't by choice, though, as my parents were strict Christians who were extremely against homosexuality (and any other issues associated with it, such as transgenderism, though I knew nothing about that sort of thing back then). My mother violated my privacy and read my diary, which forced me out. Discussing my sexual orientation with my classmates and friends was never an issue for me, however trying to have a logical and calm discussion with my mother was out of the question. She grounded me, and wouldn't let me have my best friend over, for fear of leaving us alone. As though it meant that simply because I was bisexual, that every girl I was left alone with would lead to some same-sex hanky-panky. Ridiculous. Even if I was completely straight, would leaving me alone with a boy instantly turn into a full-on make out session? No, of course not. So why would she (or anyone else, for that matter) think that it would work that way with a girl? Again, ridiculous.

I haven't had to think about these issues for many years, as my sexuality doesn't really come into play in my daily life. I am a married mother. I am married to a man. I don't have the urge to be with a woman, but that doesn't change who I am, or how I identify myself. I will always consider myself bisexual, even if it doesn't really affect the way I live my life. I made the choice to be with a man, but it still doesn't change my sexual orientation.

The only reason I'm even thinking about this now, is because I was recently introduced to a band called "The Cliks". The lead singer, Lucas Silveira, is a transgendered man. I don't fully understand everything associated with the term, all I know is that he was born a woman and surgically transformed himself into a man. I have no problem with that. Like I said, to each their own. I personally don't understand why anyone would go to such extreme lengths to change who they are physically, but then again I also don't understand a lot of plastic surgery options that people elect to have done.

Recently on his Facebook page, Lucas posted this link:

In the ad, a Christian advocacy group points out some things that teachers are being forced to teach to very young children (JK - grade 3) about transgenderism.

This is an ad he also posted as a response to the public outrage over the incident:

Now, I can understand the outrage over the ad. The way it was presented was hateful and shameful, and I don't agree with their way of dealing with it. However, as I also posted on Lucas' page, I do agree that teaching such young children about such mature ideas is not a teacher's place. It's MY place. If I choose to teach my son about it when he's at a mature enough age to understand the issues surrounding transgenderism, then that's my call. And I fully intend to do so, if and when it comes up. But teaching a 4 year old about gender roles and whatnot seems wrong to me. They're too young to understand such adult issues!

If my son comes to me some day and tells me that he's gay, I will love him all the more for having the courage to come out and choose it for himself. Being gay will never make me love him any less. If he comes to me some day and tells me, "Mom, I'm going to have surgery and hormone replacement therapy in order to change myself into a woman, because I don't identify with the roles placed on men and want to be a woman" ... I know I will still love him. I will never judge him on the choices he makes for himself. I will admit that I think I will be a little hurt by that choice, as it would feel that I was a failure as a mother. My body created him, my body made him a boy, so him doing that would make me feel as though I failed to create him in the way he wanted. I'm sure that's not the actual case with transgendered individuals, but coming from a mother's perspective, that's what I see. I honestly don't know how to explain how I'd feel about it though. He will always be my little boy, even if he grows up and decides to physically become a woman. The thought hurts my heart, but I would still love him just as much as the day he was born.

So in conclusion, yes I have a problem with the ad. Yes I also have a problem with that curriculum being taught to my young son when he's in school. That's my job, and I dislike that schools are trying to take over my role.

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